He said –
She already dumped me years ago so what do I have to lose when there is so much for readers to gain?
Let’s say I know a certain woman. Let’s also say I have known this particular woman quite well for many years. I will narrow it no further as you already clearly know I don’t mean my mother. Hypothetically typing, this person attended classes and now has a CCW to carry a concealed weapon. It may have also happened that in a random communication she expressed a need to find a pistol that fits her better. She made it clear she meant size and weight and that the .45 was unsuited for carrying in her purse.
As oft happens, I was already pondering a more suitable weapon. Numerous options came to mind, some of them hysterical stereotypes of human sexuality. After ‘sleeping on it’, one point must be shared. Additionally, I am saving all of my really petty for Hym as the last sighting anyone has had was the guy who snapped the photo that was placed on the milk carton.
Disclaimer: I am an NRA member. I do not own a mass manufactured, gunpowder driven, projectile weapon of any kind. Potato gunners unite! This is not a political statement about any Amendment and its true purpose. I will say politely, should I choose to own one of the above mentioned projectilers and you come to my home to take possession you are no longer my voting sanctioned for violence government enforcement; but merely the uniformed ammo and weapon delivery person. Thank you for my new toys, the extra ammo, and my sincerest condolences to the bereaved.
A weapon more suited for carrying in your purse? It took me some time to realize the noise at the garage door was not the sign of final readiness for departure. That chaos was merely the sound of accessorizing, or relocation of strategic necessities for this particular outing. The outer camouflage (alleged to be an item called purse) is the far most important tactical piece and the mission chose the purse. Remember that one movie where Rambo took the strap off the purse, sawed down a tree, and built a catapult from the wood? Nor do I, as when they were filming Rambo FF (geek hexadecimal joke), the main character died when the damn strap broke, unable to carry the weight of the purse, and Rambo was killed by male silverback gorillas attracted to the lingering scent of honey badger leather and potpourri. I think it was Spock who once said ‘the need of a pistol outweighs the safety needed for a man’s gun.’ What he meant by that was, I absolutely need to have a pistol with me at all times, even if it means it rubs my forward pants button and the imminent danger points toward my man compass.
Fatal Flaw number two is as follows. Ever watch her rush to find keys in her purse? Cell phone ringing and has to be retrieved from the – I want to say undetectable extension charm—but, purse?
My suggestions for suitable: bazooka, SKS (inside joke I know she understands now), or H&K MP5. Any weapon too damned big to fit inside a purse is best suited.
Just my thoughts.